Hello, Old Friend

I'm just going to cut to the chase and say that I have been Chicken's-head-cut-0ff BUSY!

Usually I blog in the evenings when my loves are snoozing away then I get busy and blog my little heart out. Lately, that ain't happening.

I replaced that precious time with much needed SLEEP.

But-
I have time now.

The girls are out for the night,
Eric is winning me some new shoes at the Casino ;)

And for the first time in a while, I am not dog tired.


*SO*


Emme turned 3.
Laughs, tears, and shaking of head with disbelief went on that horrible joyous day.
We spent it with loved ones, cake, and lots of presents.

Yes, I am sad she is growing up, but man, is she so dang CUTE at this age.
Although, "cute" has a couple different meanings lately.

Like,
Oh how cute, she just gave Peppa a bath in the toilet.

or
How cute, she keeps saying "you tooted" after EVERYTHING she thinks is funny.

*Yes, I know it doesn't make any sense. Makes it that more frustrating, really.

***

We had an amazing time in Phoenix celebrating a Birthday, Christmas, showing off our new Charlee, and catching up with family we all missed dearly.

It was a fast 1o days. A much NEEDED 10 days.
Emme and Charlee were slathered in love.

Emme had a crazy good time at Chuck E Cheese for her Birthday party. It was her first time there, too! She is obsessed with tokens and tickets now and reminds me of them all the time. She loved that place.

<3

Our Phoenix family (+ Ash from CA :))

Helping Grandma make some delicious breakfast

I could upload the million pictures I took of everyone opening presents but I'm going to save lots of time by just sticking to one. Here is E opening her Christmas Eve present. It was a mug Daddy used to drink hot coco out of when he was little. Now it's hers. (she is obsessed with hot coco)

Enjoying Christmas day

Meeting GGma

Papa and Charlee were stuck like glue. Best buds.

Sweet Aunt Ashlee time meeting her new Niece.

My other siblings <3

Ornaments! It was the Nativity inside a color changing globe.

Christmas morning. So much joy.

Walking Mocha and Java. That and feeding them treats were hands down her highlight of the trip I'm sure. She loves her some puppies.

Charlee meeting her Great Aunt Carol and fam

PJ's and Angry Birds. Enough said.



We flew home and had to say a sad goodbye to Arizona just before the new year.

It was hard to be sad long though. We had someone very special waiting for us when we got home.....

Aunt Holly!!!!!!!!!!!

Holly rocks at life.
She is an awesome person.
Awesome people make other awesome people aware of their awesomeness.
Awesome people who like her, offer "make it rain" jobs. Which she again, rocks at.
Holly, the awesome person, can now do said "make it rain" type things and purchase a ticket to Mississippi to bring in the New Year with other Awesome people (me, of course).

We sure do love and miss your awesomeness, Aunt Holly.
Thank you for starting my new year off right.



*I suddenly have the urge to play Dance Central with you again...

Coming up for air

Gymnastics on Monday
Soccer practice on Wednesday, game on Saturday
Gym AM workouts Monday-Saturday
Running in the evenings
+
6 week "Shape of the coast" contest (biggest loser style) which includes trainer workouts every Monday and Wednesday
Church on Sundays

Then add a nursing (almost 5 month old) cute baby and a VERY active 3 year old.

Yep, we have officially entered chaos that is family life.

And I wouldn't want it any other way.


***I still need to blog about Emmers Birthday, Christmas, our Phoenix trip, Holly's visit, and gee, the last 3 months of Charlee's life!

Maybe sometime this year I'll do it.

Happier things

Like starting a new year

&

Remembering that one year ago today, we found out our little Charlee was on her way


&

Talking wedding plans for Holly & her lucky guy


&

Ordering Emme's FIRST jersey for her very first team, the Kings.


yes,

Happy things like being able to call myself a "soccer mom", ought to be just enough to blow the rest of the tramatic-fall-stink right off!

How a second could have changed everything

Being a Parent is full of it's good and bad moments.
Most of the time, those bad moments make you appreciate those good times even more.

With that said, something happened yesterday. A bad, scary, moment.

It was Holly's last day visiting with me and the girls before she headed home to Utah. We watched a movie while the girls took their naps. About half way through, I went to go get Charlee for her next feeding.

******
After I retrieved her from the bassinet, I started to descend from the top stair, just then, I lost my footing and less than a second later, I found myself in pain lying flat on my back with my sweet 4 month old Charlee crying in my arms.
Just that fast.

911 was called almost as immediately as it happened.

My Mother instincts kicked in full throttle.

Eric was called.
Emme was taken back upstairs after she awoke from her nap from the commotion.
Holly was on the phone with dispatch.
I was keeping Charlee still in my arms until they arrived.
All while trying to remember all that happened in that split.second.

How hard was the fall?
Did she hit her head in the spot that I thought I saw?
Did I support her neck so not to have whip lash?
Did she hurt anything else in that DAMN fall???
Is . she . okay?

Paramedics arrived in 13 minutes.
Charlee was assessed and questions were asked.
I told them my concerns and all the detail I could remember.

******

Charlee calmed down and even started to smile before that last paramedic left.
Putting to rest everyone's fears.
They told me to monitor her for any behavior out of the normal.
I was informed with signs of swelling.
They also told me to wake her every couple hours.

Eric ran through the front door right before the last cop left.
He consoled both Charlee and myself just in time. I allowed myself to release after the last person left.

The most important part?

Charlee would be fine.

Mama on the other hand, well, that's another story.
I felt ill the entire day.

I was left to remember and replay that horrible moment that lead to horrible thoughts of "what could have happened" to put me in a coma like mood.

That fall scared me stupid.
The following "could be's" left me in sorrow.

******

I woke up very sore.
The exact spots I landed on the stairs, are screaming this morning. Mom was left with rug-burns, bruises, and a dismal heart.

Charlee woke up her joyfully common, baby-self.
Definitely not out of her norm.
Not so much as a bump or bruise on her.


I could not wait to kneel and thank my Heavenly Father for watching over my baby and avoiding a potential devastating outcome.

******

Like I said, it's those bad moments that make you SO eternally grateful for the healthy child and life you have.

Not saying at. all. that I welcome them though.

I could go my whole life without experience a moment like that again and it still would be too soon.

Happy Birthday

My life changed forever 3 years ago.

I was given the miraculous gift of being a Mother.

I was entrusted with being a parent to this little girl.

Although, "little" does not describe anything other than her stature.

Her remarkable spirit, has always been bigger than her limited body.

Her gratefulness for things, expressed through sweet her demeanor, giant hugs and ear to ear grins, make you feel like one proud Mom and sometimes, even a perfect Mom.

Her belly laughs, silly jokes, dancing, and singing still stop me in my tracks. I am her biggest fan. She captivates me.

She is a better sister than I prayed for her to be.

She includes only a select few people in her prayers every night. Charlee is generally always the first to be prayed for.

She gives me something new to think about daily, even when sometimes I don't particularly feel like learning that day. I am most thankful for those "pop quiz" lessons. It makes me a better Mom. I become a better person. Many times I have failed, and pray for a new day to bring a "do-over" so I can have another chance to get it right and do better. Admiringly, she is also a very forgiving person.

She is, beyond argument, beautifully gifted in every.single.way

And she is only 3.

My sweet little Emme blesses us all more than words can say. I feel so deeply honored that God has entrusted our family with a child as exceptional as her.

I love you, Emmelyn Deborah. With all of me. I do.

Mommy

Memory preservation

I would never forgive myself if I didn't write this down.


Let me start off with some history:

Emme has wowed me with how wonderfully she has taken on the "Big Sister" role.
She is a natural and is always looking for ways to help Mama with her Sissy.

Then there is Charlee.
What an exceptional little baby.
She is SUCH a joy to have in this family.
She happily "goes with the flow" and is so content.
On crazy days, where it seems everything is happening at once, she doesn't mind just relaxing and chilling in the bouncer watching Mama run around like crazy. I guess it may be entertaining to her, who knows : ) Sometimes she hasn't been held longer than I would like, but she seems not to mind. Which absolutely blows me away.

Although, there is something that she does not like. Driving in the car at night.
If she is wide awake, she usually is pretty fussy on that drive. And the only cure is pulling into the garage. But there is another way.

Emme will use her sweet little voice and sing to her. I get such pleasure singing to my babies. It is something that is so special to me. So to have my oldest know the importance and the power of song, does my heart good.

Emme's favorite song to sing is " I am a child of God".
It is the sweetest thing to hear her try to console Charlee while she is being fussy in her car seat.


And I thought that was the sweetest thing she has done.

So something happened the other afternoon.
Something that I never ever ever ever want to forget.
Times when they are fighting and bickering, I will bring this story up to try and show them the sister love they "once" had.

I had just put Emme down for her afternoon nap.
About half and hour into her snoozing away, I attempted to rock Charlee to sleep.
She wasn't having it and started to be fussy.
Fussy turned into some pretty heavy crying.

Just at that moment of consoling the crying, I heard the most beautiful thing ever.
Emme started to sing "I am a child of God" from in her room.
She sang 2 verses and in that time, we were able to get Charlee to stop and fall asleep.
Emme finished her beautiful song, then it was silent.
She went back to sleep for the rest of the 2 hours.

Something about that touched me to the core.
It was the purest act of concern I have ever witnessed Emme do.

She woke up, sang to her Sister from in her room, then went back to sleep after the crying stopped.

What a sweet spirit she has.
What an awesome child I was given.